Out with the old................In with the New!

Happy New Year Divas! and Kings ....................

Wow! I woke up this morning super excited about the new year, at first I couldn't figure it out. Then, I thought about everything I'd experienced in 2011, and the emotions took over. It suddenly became crystal clear, OmGoodness! I am excited about all the blessings coming my way. God's promises are real.

Yes, this year-2011 has seen some serious "stretching", I've lived, loved and lost. There was plenty of laughter and plenty of tears, some much needed clarity, self enlightenment, goals accomplished, fears conquered, my heart was broken and mended all in the same breathe. Amen. I realized that God doesn't remove something if he doesn't have something better, especially when that "something" was placed in your life for a lesson, and a stepping stone to the next "better" thing.

When you evaluate your life, start with "I woke up this morning, and I'm reading this awesome blog" IJS.Then check your senses, eyes, ears, taste, touch, smell, and are your limbs working? Is your mind functioning? You got food? shelter? clothing?, I want you to break it all down. The pros certainly outweigh the cons, don't they? We've got to learn to appreciate what we have, and be thankful, grateful and acknowledge that with God nothing is impossible. Nothing! Every new day God allows us, an another opportunity to do something new, something different, something AWESOME!

I pray, not only for myself, but for all my friends and loved ones. I pray for good health, prosperity, goals reached, did I say prosperity?, peace of mind, love, light and laughter. If you encounter some bullshit, and you will, learn from it and move on. Give your loved ones their flowers while they can still smell them, spend more time with your kids, if your blessed to still have your parents living " be patient" lol.  Please stand in faith, claim your blessings! and know that you're walking out of the old.............and into the new. See you at the top!

SOMERANDOMSHIT (Dating).................#4

This Random Shit is all about the dating game................People It's about to get  real up in this bitch! I'm going to talk about ninjas - black men vs black boys, and white boys! also know as the Caucasian persuasion.


1. Why do men assume YOU want THEM?


2. Why do men assume because your fluffy and fabulous (yours truly) that you're also desperate?


3. Who in the hell told these sorry ass ninjas that it's alright to not feed a Diva?


3a............ or at least offer a bitch a glass of WATER!!


4. Just because we grant you a kiss does not mean you're getting the drawers!


4a........and if you do get the drawers "I" decided that shit! not you!-you ain't got that much game.


5. It cost money to look this fabulous! nails, hair (braids, weaves or wigs- it wasn't FREE)


5a. .......look you're always telling me how good I look, and how good I smell - KICK IN!


6. OMG! Begging!- I've encountered too many begging, hint dropping, "I need $20" ass ninjas


7. Swag-licious not a brand label, but an attitude, a personality, so just like Divas aren't made? Duh!


8. Ditto! brothers..... a pedicure and a clean pair of drawers carries a lot of weight.


9. So What! I snore Ninja! get over it.......................


10. Watch out Brothas! Mr. Charlie has stepped up his game. I told you I'd date outside my race.



11. Last 4 dates = 2 brothas vs 2 white boys, both white men took me out to eat............hmmmmm



11a......what's wrong with this picture? Black Men!!



12. Please! Don't front like you've never tried on-line dating, or even considered it.



13. Let me clear this up people- Assholes come in ALL colors..



14. These and so much more keep bringing me back full circle to Proverbs 18-22. God I hear you!!


15. Any dating suggestions?


16. Hey! leave some of your own dating mishaps, I'd love to hear them. Share!!!

The Lotus Flower...........and Me

The Lotus Flower it grows in the deep nasty slimy mud, at the bottom of the lake, far away from the sun. But, sooner or later, after the painful and difficult trials and tribulations of its existence, the Lotus Flower eventually reaches the wonderful light becoming the most beautiful flower ever.

An ancient symbol of enlightenment, self-regeneration and motivation the lotus flower will represent the many positive changes coming my way in 2012. I have claimed my resurrection! They thought I was down, they thought I was out, but not this Diva! My new life has just begun, there is love in my future, this is prosperity in my future, this is the one baby! This year-2011 has been..............Whew! a whole lotta things, eye opening, spiritual, painful, distracting, a waste of time, lackluster, sacrificial, petty, revealing, did I say painful and a waste of time? educational, cycles of bullshit, happy, sad. winning, losing, laughter, tears, joy, sunshine and rain, it's been all those things and so much more. Would I change anything? probably not. God does things in his own time, and in his own way. We may not always agree with his methods, or the process required, or which paths are presented before us, and I know my stubborn, running on self will behind doesn't always want to admit that he knows whats best for me. But! I'm here to tell you he ain't never left me or he's never forsaking me. I'm still here, and I'm still standing.

I look in the mirror and I see a woman who hasn't and still doesn't always do the right thing, I'm no saint, and anyone that professing to be............"Run! Forest! Run!. They're a liar and the truth ain't in em'. I am 50 years old, and I'm still learning about life, and about people. That never changes, people are in your life for one of two reasons 1) to teach you or 2) to learn from you. Period. Life is and can be that fucking simple. You give as good as you get, and most times you give more. Why? because it's just set up that way. It's give and take baby, either your the given or the taker, and it's not always fair, it fluctuates.

I'm a full time mommy now too! Damn! I tell you it's been a challenge, but so very worth it. I don't regret having my baby come live with me for one minute I love my son so much, and I just want to be a good parent. I didn't have the opportunity to raise my two oldest sons, and I'm just grateful for the chance to make a positive difference in his life.

I'm so excited about this coming year, and all the possibilities that God has placed in my life. Who knew that college could be so great! My earlier college days are a total blur, and shit so are my 20s, my 30s and fuck! the first few years of my 40s. I guess what I'm saying is God woke me up today, and for this I am grateful. I'm going into 2012 with happiness on my mind, love in my heart and small to major changes on the agenda.

And just like that Lotus Flower I'd allowed myself to be in that cold and slimy mud, hiding from the sunshine for way too long, afraid of change, afraid of life, hell! afraid of myself. But I want to see the light, and I feel the warmth of the rays shining down on me, and I want to feel rejuvenated, regenerated and enlightened, because just like that Lotus Flower I am beautiful......................

Whew!...............I swear I'm gonna kill this boy!

S.O.S.

I'm reaching out to you! all parents, fathers and mothers who have a teenage son. I swear I'm ready to kill this boy! I've tried begging, threatening, removal, and reward, but he just ain't grasping the concept. The concept of "you will be 18 in 6 1/2 months" and LIFE is ready and waiting. Life! where things aren't constant, nor are they fair.

Let me give you a little history, maybe that will help you to help me. My son came to live with me almost two yrs ago, see there were some "issues" surrounding his bitch ass step mother "Lady Sha'ron. (She's an entire chapter all by her evil self.) Okay, let's get back to the boy child. They say it takes an entire village to raise a child, and I'm reaching out to you "village", cause I'm about to kill this ninja!!! His sorry ass daddy talking about " He needs to go to the military, so they can teach him how to be a man" WTF! have you been doing for the past 15 years?

I knew that he had issues, Hell! he was raised in a house full of fools,  in-laws included!, but this crazy shit has continued too long. I'm just trying to get a brotha to walk across that stage, I need my life back! I'm 50 and I've got "Stella" plans, I want to get my GROOVE BACK!

I'm rambling and shit, I'm so pissed I lost sight of the subject. Late/Tardy, Absent/Ditching and Missing/Fuck it! I ain't doing it assignments. Then he has the "Awwww ba dassity" to want a girlfriend, play basketball, and hang out! Then I get the truancy letter from the school district! It's a friggin wrap people! I told his ass NO! basketball, No! Christmas, and no Mutha friggin Nothing!. I'm tried people! He can get his shit and get out!! OUT!! Whew!............I swear I'm gonna kill this boy!

Please pray for this Diva, because there are only two words saving his black ass................ "THREE STRIKES"

For the Love of...............Me.

Dear Mr. "Not Right for Me".................

I really needed to express this to you, and this is one of the hardest things this Diva has shared in awhile; for all those years I allowed myself to be "lost"  in you. I say "lost" because during the course of the relationship I'd actually stopped looking out for #1- Me. I'm not surprised, the relationship was doomed from the very beginning, mainly because it wasn't meant to be, both logically or morally. I believe I was very lonely, and looking for love in all the most fucked up places.

This is not some "tell it all"or even a confessional, it's me letting go. It's true people can give you advice, but only you know when it's time to truly let it go. I had a few sistahfriends who were aware of my situation, but I'd  kept it a secret from most people. Why? let's face it, I knew it wasn't right.

Fast forward to present day........................

It's been close to 3 years , and something as insignificant as a birthday present ended our relationship. The truth is the relationship had been on a down hill slope for the last year or so anyway. The gifts, the dinner dates, and romantic get aways had come to a screeching halt. However I stayed, I'd gained 30lbs and felt unattractive, and complacency was my first, middle and last name. But! my inner Diva kept whispering in my ear, telling me that I am a franchise player, and allowing myself to come off the bench for someone elses team was no longer acceptable. God will and He shall do for you what you cannot do for yourself. He knows.

Life is such a fabulous journey, and everyday holds a new experience. We have choices, and we do make mistakes, this is how we grow.  Will I miss you? Of course I will, I was in love with you, But I love me more. Do I regret the relationship? Of course I do, because right now I'm still hurting . Will I get over it? Most certainly I will because I am a survivor, a soldier, a Diva.

Sincerely your ex-mistress,

Me

Interview: Author Curtis "Swagnificent" Alcutt ~ Mr. Erotica

I'm not exactly sure how I met Curtis Alcutt, I do believe it was some where in cyber-space. I just know that our relationship has grown into something special, and it's been my pleasure to watch this extraordinary man's career soar. So, I gave Mr.Swagnificent a call, and asked him if he'd grant this Diva a little one on one.................

Sistahfairy:"Curtis! Thank you so much for taking the time to grace us with your sexy presence. I'm just going to jump right into this thang. When did you realize that writing was your divine destiny?

Curtis Alcutt: I have always loved reading and writing. In the third grade, while I was supposed to be working on math, I got busted by my teacher working on a cartoon strip entitled “The Nose People.” I just knew my ass was grass, but instead she complimented me on my creativity and told my parents. They were as impressed as my teacher was. A short time after that, my school had a creative writing contest. My teacher insisted that I enter. I won! A whopping $1.50!

Sistahfairy: Erotica? Where did that come from?

Curtis Alcutt: Hmmmmm…I guess my inner freak saw that title and knew that’s where I belonged. I had no idea what erotica was until I read my first Zane novel back in around 2004. After reading that and a Eric Jerome Dickey novel, I said to myself, “I can do this!” after that, I had to put up or shut up. Ninety days and 80,000 words later, I finished my first erotic novel “Dyme Hit List” published by the now defunct Black Pearl Books in Atlanta. I am re-releasing “Dyme Hit List” under its original title, “Eyes of a Player.” The eBook is available now, the paperback will be officially released around valentine’s Day, 2012

Sistahfairy: I consider myself pretty damn grown and extremely sensual, and I want to know if you, Mr. Swagnificant are nasty by nature or nurture?

Curtis Alcutt: I think nature nurtured my nasty ass…fuckin’, suckin’, moanin’ and bonin’ are the SHIT! And I have no problem expressing my fondness for it. I personally think that everyone is nasty, but not everyone is willing to acknowledge it. As a kid I was very introverted, but once I hit puberty, it was on and crackin’. I’m not saying be irresponsible about your sexual encounters, but do enjoy them. After all, we only have so much time on this big, blue marble, so you best get all the enjoyment you safely and responsibly can.

Sistahfairy: I agree with that! it is the ish! Please play responsibly, and also do not text and drive. Curtis what are you currently working on?

Curtis Alcutt: Right now, I’m busy finishing up the sequel to my hot erotic thriller, “Sins of a Siren.” The follow up novel is called “Fatal Intentions: Sins of a Siren 2” Both are publish by erotica queen, Zane via Strebor Books, an imprint of mega-publisher, Simon & Schuster. I’m thrilled and blessed to be on this winning team. Also, I, along with my mentor and writing partner are working on book two in the “Black Widow and the Sandman” series. This is a suspense/thriller series sprinkled with romantic elements. This ongoing series features predominately African American characters. It’s best described as a Mission Impossible/James Bond hybrid. If you are a fan of high-tech, dangerous, globetrotting, action, then this is a must read for you! Visit www.llreaper.net for more info. You can even help us pick the cast for the movie!

But, at t this very moment, right now, this minute, I have “Fatal Intentions: Sins of a Siren 2” open on my desktop. I’m about 56,000 words in. My goal is to finish it up by Christmas Day, 2011. Only another 30,000 words to go…

Sistahfairy: I've heard some wonderful things about your literacy program, tell us about that.

Curtis Alcutt: Among other things, I’m president of the literary foundation, WriteWay2Freedom. Our goal is to reach out to kids—especially at-risk youth—and expose them to literacy. I get great enjoyment from helping them find freedom through writing’s therapeutic powers. If you have an organization or event that could benefit from our programs, contact Mati Hara Management - 916.237.7033

Sistahfairy: That's great! Our future is definitely in our children, and I know from my own childhood that books actually saved me, they helped me through some rough times while growing up. It allowed me to escape, if only temporarily, I felt free. Curtis, your talent is so amazing, where do you see this gift taking you?

Curtis Alcutt: My ultimate goal is to have one or more of my books to make it to the big screen or a cable TV series. I’m currently working hard on getting the screenplay for “Black Widow and the Sandman” written. I have it in the hands of a Hollywood insider right now, hoping he will make it happen. Or give me a damn good shot at it…

Sistahfairy: It's always a pleasure for me when we connect, and I'm still waiting on you to take me camping. Is there was one last thing you'd like us to know about Curtis "Swagnificent" Alcutt?

Curtis Alcutt: Hmmm… I want you to know that I appreciate all of you that have read or are reading my books. (Even those of you who borrowed a copy instead of BUYING one to support ya brother.) Other than that, I plan on keeping you wet, hard, horny and thrilled with my writing. Be on the lookout for a lot more in 2012. Stop by my website www.curtisalcutt.com and leave me a note. (nasty or otherwise) Hurry back my way!

Sistahfairy: Take it from me Ladies, Mr.Curtis Alcutt aka ".Swagnificent", is the new reigning King of Erotica, and a serious force to be reckoned with, so hold on to those panties, it's bout get hot and nasty up in here!

SOMERANDOMSHIT...............#3

1. "Don't you think it's time for you to throw that raggedy ass wig away?"

2. ....................Calling all Cat Daddies!!!

3. I STILL haven't decided what I want to be when I grow up!

4. Hmmmmm............What are the true qualities of a Sistahfriend?

5. A pedicure, and a pair of clean panties carry a lot of weight.

6. Whatever happened to the art of dating?

7. To know me, is to know not to fuck up on my birthday!!

8.  America! The only place in the world where a FAT ASS can turn you into a household name. IJS

9.  Why did my son and his friends think last nights eclipse was either, 1) Aliens or 2) the rapture?

10. Why the hell does my Momma keep calling my name?

11. Acknowledge your POWER as a WOMEN, and allow your inner Diva to SHINE.

12. 10+ beers per day equals drunk! Dummy.

13. Do you think people are freaky by nature or nurture?

14. WTH!  Keisha Cole's mama Frankie has a "Do the Frankie Leg" video?

15. I can give it to you, but what cha gwah do wit it?

16, If  you're hair line is receding, then that ponytail is out of the question!

17. If you are a fluffy Diva, thicka than most, curvaceous. and hella cute! Stomp your mf feet!!

18. I keep this really pretty wall up, to protect my heart. I will occasionally change the wallpaper.

19. When is it gonna be my turn?

20.  I'm going to make a dream board, I hear it's very therapeutic.

Big and Small..............Blessed!!!!

Blessing~ A blessing, (also used to refer to bestowing of such) is the infusion of something with holiness, spiritual redemption, divine will, or one's hope or approval (Wikipedia)............

A blessing can be as small as you finding an extra $1 in your purse/wallet or as big as you waking up this morning. Amen. The secret to blessings is staying with an attitude of gratitude. You must realize that God in all his infinite wisdom has placed you exactly where you need to be. " Everything is as it should be". The last two years have been a testing, stretching, tribulations, trial, trail seeking experience! On November 24th, I celebrated 7 years of sobriety, in spite of my situation. My faith has NEVER wavered, and I trust and I believe that God has a blessing so "epic" for me, it will be worth a legacy. Lord, knows I've spent many sleepless nights worrying about one thing or another, mostly things I had little or no control over. I've been without a job since March 3rd, 2010, but I haven't missed a beat. God supplies all my needs, and most of my wants. lol. I shall not complain!

Then there are the people, God understands that no man or woman is an island, everyone needs somebody sometime. Right?  I've been so super duper blessed to have certain folks in my life, some were just passing thru, they'd served their purpose. They were either in my life to learn from me or to teach my ignorant ass a lesson. I've been able to connect with friends from elementary to high school thanks to the Internet highway aka Facebook, and other social networks. I consider it all joy, To rekindle past relationships, and communicate with family too. In this day and time, family and friends are a serious support. I wake up each morning because of Grace and of course Mercy of a loving and forgiving God. He allows me another chance to "get it together". Amen.

I want you too, to take inventory of your blessings, big and small. I want you to look around at all you've been given, and know that what was taken shall either been changed for the good or replaced 10 fold. I admit that sometimes as humans do, I question my destiny. However I know that I, and you too! are blessed in ways we can't even see yet. So when you read this, do me a huge favor and call/text/email somebody you love and care about, and tell them how your life is blessed just because they are here. Amen...............................Smooches

#SOMERANDOMSHIT..................#2

* The Townhouse (La Cienega) is Cat Daddy central, and Maverick's Flat is the Cougar den! lol

* I've realized that my destiny is internal.

* This may just be my opinion BUT! there is a cut off age (26-28) for men to wear braids.

*Yes! faux fur is in, and it's cute ,but Please! don't pretend that it's real.

* "Life can be only what you make it
When you're feelin down
You should never fake it
Say what's on your mind
And you'll find in time
That all the negative energy
It would all cease~ Mary J. Blige

* Why do people LIE??

* I'm debating on relocating to another state. hmmmmmmm?

* I need to lose friggin 50lbs!!!

* I've said this before" You know you're too damn old! to be wearing that outfit"

* You're right! they're contacts, and this isn't really my hair (wig/weave), Yes! these are acrylic nails , and I'm wearing Spanx. BUT! Dammit I look GOOD???

* I need some major CHANGE SOON!! (The Lord is streeeeetchhhhhhing me)

* I LOVE Hotel rooms....on & off air, black-out drapes, room service, major thread count, extra pillows.

* I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up.

* WTH!? Am I suppose to do with your_____________________ass?

* McDonalds has become my new social hangout. They have FREE WiFi, and $1 sweet tea.
* bucket list continued..............#4 Become a published writer,

#5 Have a weekly advise column in a major newspaper (Why not!?)

 #6 Take ALL my Sistahdiva friends on the bomb.com vacation, all expenses (well almost all!) on me. "Getting our groove back"

* I'll build the house of my dreams, and make it into a HOME..


* I wanna take a "Thelma and Louise" road trip with  my 2 besties...........Sandbox and Twin! (No cliff action involved)

When Is Enough Too Much?

#1  Enough is too much when it has you turned around and upside down..............I'm in a situation where I've actually had enough of the bullshit! I'm a star forward on the starting team, and I've been (allowed myself) put on the bench as bench warmer, not even 2nd or 3rd string! Ladies! What the hell! I'm Kobe up in this bitch, and I'm accepting this? Now Sistah's I'm confessing this because I need a swift kick in the arse. I know I'm selling myself short, but I've become complacent, and comfortable in the position, and it ain't cool. I never said I was perfect, and I damn sure am no angel. I'm human, and fuck it! a bitch gets lonely. And! don't you dare judge me. I'm just doing my best to keep it as real as possible and reveal some truths about myself, in hopes that another sistah will hear this shit, and not make the same mistakes. I have to accept my predicament, and realize that only I can change it. What will I do when/if he calls me (Oh! he will). It's been close to three years, and I'm getting exactly what I signed up for, nothing more and nothing less. I don't need to state the obvious, Sistah's you can decipher this situation. Pray for this Diva, okay. Pray that I continue to realize my value, understand my worth, and follow my destiny.

#2  Enough is too much when "they" continue to use my past to hurt and to judge me. Why? because they haven't learned to get over what my past meant to them. I have been forgiven-1st by God, and 2nd I forgive myself. I am a good mother, and a great grandmother. I may not be there yet, but I'm closer than I was yesterday. This Thanksgiving- 11/24th, I will be celebrating 7 years of sobriety. Trust, this was no small feat, it is ONLY by the grace and mercy of a loving and forgiving God that I am still here. I've experienced that some people will never see me as anything other than a crackhead, but that's their problem! After 7 yrs of continuous sobriety, they can kiss my ass! I have been delivered (to be set free) from crack cocaine, and life goes on. I disrespected myself during my addiction for almost 20 years, I can't allow anyone to have that power over me. I made myself a promise when I first became sober. "Anyone, Anyone, family included that threatens my sobriety or my insanity must be eliminated!" Poof asshole be gone.......................I will pray for them, and hope that one day they will receive some sort of clarity. I've had enough and it turned out to be way too much!


This blog is a safe place for me, a place of truth, a place for love, and a great format for expression. I'm happy I came, and I'm really happy that you're here to share this journey...................

Sportie LAb Interview by SAM- 11/09/2011- An Interview with a DIVA

An Interview with a DIVA

by SAMon November 9th, 2011at 8:25 pm

Posted In: Chemistry of a Diva

Shaster is a DIVA. Yes that is meant to be in all caps because that’s how much of a diva she is, caps just do her more justice, a few exclamation points would do her even better. When our editor and chief Boo asked me to interview her on what it’s like to be a Diva, I was ecstatic. I need to learn a thing or two about how to up my game as a woman and Shaster is as inspirational as they come.
To understand a diva we may need a definition. According to Shaster a diva is an inner quality of strength, beauty, perseverance, life goals, a strong almost conceded independence and an acknowledgment of your power as a woman. “ A Diva is a lady, but we’re not ladies all the time. I can be a bitch, or dirty, we’re a multitude of ladies. It’s a grand thing!” In my mind I’m picturing a sexually active Elizabeth Benet from Jane Austin’s Pride and Prejudice.
“A DIVA is born!” explains Shaster when I ask her how she became this fabulousness that is diva. When I asked when she realized she had an inner diva existed, she talked about her dad. “Your environment molds your diva, my environment was real. My father was a neighborhood hustler, he instilled that I was special from infancy. Everything we had expressed individuality, from our white low rider bikes to matching helmets, we were special.” Because of him I don’t allow men I don’t know to call me names like honey, baby, princess…. That’s a term of endearment you use for a mate, not just any woman off the street.”
When I first thought of diva, I thought of a strong woman with too much attitude, Shaster explains that’s not what it’s about at all. “You do what you have to, not what you want to do. I always follow through on commitments and yes, I can be a bitch but never in a malicious way. If I do something that hurts someone I care about, I will apologize because I care more about you than the fact that I’m right.”
Still confused I ask again if bitch and diva go hand and hand. She explains that the love you receive on your birthday and your deathbed says who you are as a person. “I just had the best birthday a diva could ever have! It was my day and it was everything I’ve always wanted and more, you know if my future husband walked in that would make it better, but everything was perfect. I’m still thanking the over 100 people on Facebook that acknowledged me for being me! It’s important because of all the struggles I’ve gone through, everything is as it should be at 50.”
Being a strong independent woman can be lonely and hard. “I don’t have the privilege of being able to say, f*ck it I’m done. I’ve always been strong for everyone; I’m not going to fall apart because I’m having a bad day, or even a bad couple of years! I’m constantly recreating myself, but I’m always a diva.”
In my experience it seems like strength and loneliness go hand and hand. As I’ve grown older, I’ve also grown harsher; men don’t exactly hop on the emotionally inept train. Shaster seems to be in the same boat, “I used to be on the prowl and you have there holidays and lonely days, I’m deciding at 50 that I’m done looking for a man; I’m looking at the bible. Proverb 18.22 says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.” It’s time for my husband to find me; I did meet someone on Saturday, he’s great but I’m taking it slow. I honestly don’t want anything material but I do need something that’s spiritual, emotional and physical. I believe that when you know you know, but it would be really nice if God just shined a big spotlight on his head with a giant arrow, it’s him!” Being a strong independent woman can be threatening to men, “ If you seem like I can run you over, I will, it’s the diva in me.” Shaster is looking for her equal, someone that is stronger than her inner diva, to be a man of the house who allows her to be who she is; I think we can all agree that it’s difficult for everyone to find that perfect balance in a partnership, but being an independent woman, it’s even more so.
Shaster just launched a new divalicious blog, http://sistahfairydiva.blogspot.com/. “I talk about funny shit, serious shit, my thoughts, memories and expressions. More will be reveled as time goes on; I just want people to hear my story.” Shaster is truly an inspirational figure, a former drug addict and single mother who took the bull by the horns and got help. “I should be dead! But I’m not and I’m doing well; people who have been like me need to see what I’ve accomplished. If I’ve touched one person by what I do, then I’m touched. ”
Being an outstanding mother, Shaster also wants to leave a legacy for her children, this blog will help them understand her completely at the end of the journey. “I want my kids to look back and say, “Damn, my mom did that or she is that” this blog is for them.”” I think we can all appreciate that, my mother is one of my best friends and I would never regret knower her better.
Please check out Shaster’s blog! Her undying strength is truly inspirational and we can all learn a thing or two about being an ultimate diva.

#SOMERANDOMSHIT.................#1

* A Nigga will ask you absolutely ANYTHING!! - "Will you", "Can I, "Do you" etc.....................

* Do people have to post their every friggin move on fb? isn't that what Twitter is for?

* ONE inspirational or motivational quote post per day is adequate, not every minute on the hour. (Shall we pray?)

* If you knew my "truth" would you still be my friend?"

* I CANNOT!! BELIEVE THERE WILL BE NO LAKER BALL!!!

* How many fucking Metro lines is enough?

* I am totally convinced that my husband is out there looking for me right now.

* I want it all, new socks and drawers!

* My first sexual experience is a blur.(Don't judge me!)

* I am slowly becoming my mother...........Shit!

* I am attracted to tall, chocolate, intelligent, cuddly, romantic, chivalrous, family oriented brothas.

* Is it cliche to say I love long walks on the beach?

* I absolutely LOVE being a woman!

* I am a blessed and grateful recovered crack cocaine addict.

* I now realize had my father been a "parent", I would have made better choices in men.

* My 50th Birthday party was my "Coming Out" ball.

* I'd like to thank the father's of my children for three crazy ass sons- I wouldn't trade em' 4 nothing.

* "If I could I'd give you the world,  and wrap it all around you"

* My granddaughter Mariah Elyse is the true love of my life.

* I wish I would've spent more time with my grandmothers; Dorothy <3 and Mary Alice <3

* Did you know that good friends are really hard to find?

* I am going to make a bucket list.

* # 1 on bucket list- Go to New York City!

* # 2 on bucket list- Visit Graceland. (Don't judge me!)

* # 3 on bucket list - Visit Memphis (Beale Street)..............more will be revealed.

* I'm trying to learn to accept myself.

What's Next Disneyland? Lmbo

Okay! I'm here with an update on the countdown to this damn birthday weekend celebration! I've made all my arraignments,  Maverick's Flats-check, LAX Hilton-check,  Enterprise car rental reservation-check, cute fits for every day-check,  1 case of Mount Teman Root drinks- double check! I'm packed and ready to rumble.

"That's that Bullsh*t again!" Somebody better tell this crazy ass old women I do not play when it comes to my birthday.!!!!!-(mid-day flash! the so-called coordinator needs better communication skills!)

Okay I'm back....................

The party was AWESOME! OMG!!! I had the best Diva-licious birthday weekend any Diva in my tax bracket could hope for, I got everything I wanted (Well............almost is still good enough. Right?)

My friends, my dawgs, and especially my DIVAS! came through and made it happen. Friday night we turned out the Comedy Union Comedy Club, I had em' screaming out my name from center stage. The entire club sang "Happy Birthday" to me and one other patron. My rental car agent gave me a hell of a deal on luxury car: 2011 Mercedes Benz MLK 350! The LAX Hilton comped me valet parking, Then Miss April Hicks of "Facial Expressions by ASH" came to my hotel room and got a sistah DIVA ready for the evening! We partied like it was 1977, 1978, 1979, 1980........I felt like I was at the noon dance back at THE MONT! This was the best birthday ever! I had all my sistah's with me:Rosanda (Sandbox bff Diva), Dedra (Diva Twin), Chynna (Queen Diva), Marilyn (O.G. Diva), Linda (Jazz Diva), LaTanya (Sigma Diva), Saundra (AM Diva), Felicia (Blondie Diva), Star Child (Tina Diva aka Mister), Charmel (Shoe Diva), Sheila (Love Diva) etc. there were so many Divas, Queens, and Sistah's in the house-Black Girls Rock!!! My birthday buddy Joyce (Lavender Diva) was holding down her section of the V.I.P. as well. We shut the place down............

I always say there are two moments in life when your truth is known; the celebration of your birth and your death. My life was truly celebrated, I was honored and deeply touched by all the love I received this weekend. I just want to say next year.................We doing the same Damn thang!!!


Diva-licious Kisses............Muah!

Friggin 50 and Fabulous! Loving it...........

The count down has officially started............ Sunday was my sister's birthday, and we are the same age for exactly one week (I know my Dad & Mom weren't messing around). I know that in a few days, I'll be celebrating a birthday too. I'm super excited! As children, my mom treated our birthday's like our very own personal holiday. But! this here birthday coming up, this one here, is the ONE! I'm going to be fabulous, fantastic, funky, freaky 50 years old. I'm emotional, and my feelings are all over the damn place. I'm blessed, and if you knew my testimony, than you'd already know, and if you don't know, then some more shit will be revealed later. Promise.


You see technically I'm really not suppose to be here, I mean here as in alive vs dead or free vs imprisoned. God had other plans for me,through divine intervention my path was shifted. God has a divine destiny for everyone. The plan is not to question His plan for your life, but to be as prepared as possible for the plan. If left up to my own devices, I'd be up shits creek without a paddle or a fucking boat.

"I may be Poor, I may be black, I may even be ugly, but dammit I'm here............I'm here, and I'm ready to get some shit started- (in my 2011 Celie voice)



Thank God!

Love Letter to Me............

*I was feeling love deprived, and honestly a wee bit lonely. So, I decided I wanted a love letter, and thought "Why Not?" Below is a strictly hypothetical, corny as hell, sugary sweet, emotionally over the top love letter to myself.

Hello Love,

How are you doing Sweetheart? I've been thinking about you all day. I am so blessed to have someone like you in my life. The very first time I saw you, I knew that it was true love. When you walked into the room, my heart skipped a beat. I know it now,  that you were made especially for me. I realize that I'm not the first love in your life, however if you allow me, I will be your last. I plan on doing everything I possibly can to make you happy

If  the wonderful happiness, and  passionate love we share now is any indication of our future together, than I know for certain, I am truly blessed. As the scripture states; Proverbs 18:22, "he that finds a wife, finds a good thing, and obtains favor from God".  Thank God I have found  you,  and you are everything I need. My best friend, my companion, my lover, my all.

Forever, For Always, For Love (I had to throw some Luther in there)

So West Coast would like to welcome Water.com a proud sponsor of SistahFairyDiva

Disclaimer: " If you don't want to have your photo posted on my Facebook wall, do not pose for the picture"

People are funny aren't they?

They have all these rules about you, and about what you should do, with you. I have a Facebook account for many different reasons, mainly because I love the connection it allows me to have with my friends and family. I've even reconnected with my bestie from the sandbox, and most of my high school classmates. Also developing an ongoing relationship with family members, some close and others distant. I've never met some of the people on my Facebook, but because of 6-degrees of separation we are all connected. I'm loving Facebook, in spite of the constant bullshit changes (That's that bullshit!)...........Now back to the observation at hand.

I've got hundreds of photos on my Facebook page, mobile uploads, family, special occasions, fashion police, and of course the #1 inspiration in my life, my granddaughter. However, what you must realize is that if you pose for a picture, there is a strong possibility your ass is going up on the wall. Period. My life has been put on display, on Facebook, by my choice. If I pose for a picture, trust and believe, I'm assuming its going to be seen by someone other than the person who took it.

Why!, do you even get your ass in the picture, or is it you'd like to pick and choose what photos are made public? Life is all about moments shared, and making memories, right? Sometimes we look Diva-licious and other times it's just a damn bad hair day. Get over yourself Boo! If you don't want to be seen on my Facebook wall, do not pose for the damn picture. Remember, as a  potential model you either have an opportunity to move out of the way, duck under a table, hide behind a pole, or state a disclaimer, and I promise I will not post your picture. I promise.

"Just because they make it in your size, does not, I REPEAT, does not mean you should buy it! "or " You know your too damn old to be wearing that outfit"

Hello Babies,

If I didn't share this information with you, I would be wrong, wrong, damn wrong! You know every now and then I'll have a "Fashion Po-Po 4G" day and I'll take my BB and snap photos of women and men, that need both a penalty AND a fine for wearing some of the things that they leave the house in. It makes me wonder if they have any friends, because a true friend would not allow you to leave your house looking like the last fucked up fashion disaster. I will not always change the name to protect the innocent, but for the sake of losing a friendship, I'll go light this time.

Her ass was an entire separate "entity" from the rest of her body. No! you can not, should not wear a dress or skirt at a length where a sneeze will reveal the crack of your "assets" for the world to see. I don't believe little girls should dress like hookers, nor should a hooker dress like a little girl (unless it's part of a fetish, and kinky is gonna be extra). Spandex, Lycra and tube tops have a special place in fashion and it ain't on a great Grandmother.........Which leads me to the second half of this rant. If you're 60, how old does that make your mom?  Too Got Damn! old to be wearing some fucking animal print spandex pants, 4" feather earrings, and a see through top. I made my bestie vow to me with a blood promise and the threat of not another Mount Teman Root drink (I'll enlighten you on the benefits at a later date) to never ever, ever, ever let me dress like that when I reach the golden age of "don't do that". I'll fill my closet with beautiful long casual, dressy and all occasions in between dresses, tasteful and tactful. Amen. I'm a big beautiful woman,and just 3 weeks shy of fabulous 50 and there's some shit my crazy ass wouldn't even dare wear. Ok, all I'm saying people is take into consideration the feelings of your children and grandchildren when you convince yourself that's it's ok to buy the latest fashion trend.........Because I will catch your behind in public with the 4G, and place your dizzy ass on "The Wall of Shame. Try me!

Confessions of a Crack Diva.........

Why would I confess to all the really fucked up shit that you couldn't possibly imagine that I would have done?

I ain't confessing to nothing!, well at least not to everything.

My Fucked up Confessions as a Crack Diva.


A true Diva never takes a break, nor does she go on a "hiatus" from life.

She doesn't quit, not even during her crack career, she remains "Malcolm X"- By Any/All Means Necessary.

My Militant Confessions as a Crack Diva.

You should believe me when I say some dark things are best left un-said, un-remembered, and un-thought of, they belong right where they are, in the dark.

A confession told only to Jesus, he's already forgiven and forgotten.

My Grace and Mercy Confessions of a Crack Diva.

I didn't fall off of my pedestal, nah...........I kicked that bitch over. I smashed it, I pawned it, I traded it, and then I stole it right back.

How many times have I heard "Omg!, not you", and why not me?

I was vulnerable, lonely, depressed, abused, hurting inside and out, with low self esteem just like you.

My "Don't Judge Me" Confessions of a Crack Diva.

I'm still standing! I've got a family that loves me, a therapist, a psychologist and a Holy Bible. Each morning I awake to "new", and each night I go to bed to "thank you".

It's my season.

It's my season.

It's my season............

My Resurrected Confessions as a Diva.

THE ESSENCE OF A BEAUTIFUL BLACK WOMAN

Now when you hear the blacker the berry the sweeter the juice
you better believe that the berry is extra juicy and oh so sweet!!!
I mean the most ripe of all berries, that you just take a bite into.
As your lips carress the foreskin and your tongue just swirls the inside,
with the juices just dripping... dripping... dripping...
Entering your domain as you spread your tenderness wide open.
Tasting your dark exterior but light pink insides as your juices oozes its way
around the crevasses of my lips,
using the tip of my tongue as if i was dipping into your sweet juicy sauce.
A fruit oh so sweet!
Can you taste the sweet juices, and smell that fresh scent!?
Women do you know what I'm talking about?
Now see the creation of brown sugar is just an imitation, duplication,
of the black, sexy, ebony, caramel, brown tone Nubian Queen.
Black woman you are beautiful!
See now I mean there's nothing wrong with the land of milk and honey,
but I'm a man of milk and chocolate!
See because when I see a beautiful ebony, chocolate, mocha, caramel,
woman delight, my soul just takes flight.
See but yet I still can't put my finger on it.
Now what really makes a black woman so beautiful?
What is her essence?
Is it those juicy lips, slim waist, thick thighs, or the little slant in her eyes?
Or is it that saltiness in her attitude or the dash of her class?
Is it the afros, locks, braids, that naturalness in her style?
Is it that ghetto attitude with those two big circle gold plated earrings on each ear?
Or that hint of her spunk, or how her curves compliment her sexy style?
Is it your soul playing the strings in my heart with you sexy dance moves like neo soul?
But with an exterior shell that is so bold, but yet so tender and smooth.
Black woman the salt and sea of life.
The woman that I would make my wife!
Your beauty is surpassed by none!
Is the essence of a black woman skin deep?
Of is it so far deep in the green barrows, flowing in those veins passed on by generations,
too hidden that the most microscopic of microscopes can't see;
or so complicated that even Einstein's theory of E=MC 2 seems like child's play?

Black woman what is your Essence
Do you know?

Black woman you are Beautiful!

The 3 Stages of Bullsh*t.

There are 3 distinct stages to bullshit, they hardly ever change, nor do they vary.

 #1- You see it coming, and there's nothing you can do to stop it. Bullsh*t has landed in your lap. You do your very best to shake it, eliminate it, or even give it to someone else.  This is sometimes hard to do, especially when you're the asshole who initiated this bullsh*t  from the start.

#2- "Smack dab in the middle,"  knee deep, hell!, waist deep. You are in over your fucking head, it's all the same, you got major problems!  "This-that bullshit!" is raging through your brain, and you can't possibly see a way out.

#3- You've either come out of your bullsh*t, or you're on the tail end of some bullshit. It very well may have been a situation that you initiated, but you're feeling light, and you start to think "Whew, damn I'm glad that shit is finally over". Right?

and then................that  vicious bullsh*t cycle starts all over again. Bullsh*t is neither good or "not so good", it's just a part of life. Right?